Touch

After more than one year, I finally got to touch my parents' hands!

On Saturday I had the opportunity to touch, kiss, and hug my 90-year-old parents for the first time in more than a year. Who would have thought 13 months ago that would be the way I opened my column this week?

Seeing the smiles on their faces, and hearing the joy in their voices told me one thing – the length of time not being able to touch their children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren had to be tougher on them, then on any of us.

They’ve “touched” three of their four children, and a few of their grandchildren and great-grandchildren that live in New Braunfels.

All that means is there is a lot for hugs coming.

At 61 years of age I know it was a long time coming. I can only imagine how long it seemed for my parents.

It saddens me that across the country too many “leaders” continue to worship closures and lockdowns, and way too many kids still can’t be with their friends in their normal school setting, while teachers and administrators in those districts continue to draw a paycheck and elected officials do anything they can to control the peasants beneath them.

I have no idea what percentage of the population has received the COVID-19 vaccination. I do know, however, the pandemic continues to be politicized in way too many areas of our country, primarily in areas controlled by Democrats.

It has also been used as a shield to fundamentally change, or at least attempt to change, our great country.

Thank God we live in Texas, where our top leaders actually had faith in Texans to do the right thing, long before other states loosened the daily restraints on their minions, while living under different rules themselves.

By the time you read this I will have probably received my second shot. To be honest, I don’t know how that will make me feel.

I do know my father was very concerned about releasing a pair of his trousers to my wife so she could mend them!

That sounds funny to you, but to me, that means things are getting back to normal!

He’ll probably call in a day or two asking if they’ve been put in the mail.

By the time we got back to Rockport I had a few emails from my dad. One of them was called “Puns for the Day” – another sign that he is smiling inside and out.

During the past year many of his emails were spiritual in nature. That sounds normal for a preacher, but I know the isolation has affected my parents, even with their deep faith in God that everything would work out His way.

Here are the “Puns for the Day” my father emailed me. Some are corny, but I’m sure you’ll laugh at a few of them.

•••

How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, and then he lies on the other side.

•••

I have a few jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work.

•••

How do you make holy water?

You boil the hell out of it.

•••

Will glass coffins be a success?

Remains to be seen.

•••

What’s the difference between a hippo and a zippo?

One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.

•••

Two windmills are standing in a wind farm.

One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?”

The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”

•••

Hear about the new restaurant called Karma?

There’s no menu - you get what you deserve.

•••

I went to buy some camouflage trousers yesterday, but couldn’t find any.

•••

What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind?

A maybe.

•••

I tried to sue the airline for losing my luggage.

I lost my case.

•••

When everything is coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.

•••

A cross-eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

•••

She had a photographic memory but never developed it.

•••

Is it ignorance or apathy that’s destroying the world today?

I don’t know and don’t really care.

•••

I wasn’t originally going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.

•••

Which country’s capital has the fastest-growing population?

Ireland. Every day it’s Dublin.

•••

My ex-wife still misses me, but her aim is starting to improve.

•••

The guy who invented the doorknocker got a no-bell prize.

•••

I saw an ad for burial plots, and I thought, “That’s the last thing I need!”

•••

Need an ark? I Noah guy.

•••


I used to think I was indecisive; now I’m not so sure.

•••

Sleeping comes so naturally to me, I could do it with my eyes closed.

•••

What did the grape say when it got stepped on?

Nothing, but it let out a little whine.

•••

What do you call a super articulate dinosaur?

A Thesaurus.

Thank you William

A special shout out is in order this week for one of the original members of the Aransas County Long Term Recovery Team (LTRT), William Whitson. He is leaving the team after accepting a city manager’s job in Florida.

The LTRT will have secured close to $200 million in grants if final awards are received.

An update about those grants/projects will be published in the weekend edition.

Yes, there has been some public controversy, but the fruits of the LTRT will be realized in the future.

Several members remain on the job to carry out the mission, but it has been an honor knowing Whitson since shortly after Hurricane Harvey hit us.

We will all benefit from the collective efforts of the LTRT members. We may not realize, or want to accept the fruits of their labor at this time … but we will.

God’s speed William. Good luck in Florida. The only advice I can give is to avoid hurricanes!

Until next week, have a good week.

Mike Probst can be reached at publisher@rockportpilot.com.

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